If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
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And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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