apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
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