you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
