I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize