My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
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