he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize