Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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