i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize