So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
