Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
