It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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