Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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