sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
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So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
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I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.