he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
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I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
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The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
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