How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Randomize
