why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Randomize
