I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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