Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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