Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
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But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize