so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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