i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
You dont lie about slip and slides
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize
