So drunk, too bad you don't want this
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
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I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
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He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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