God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
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I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
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I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize