Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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