what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
