careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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