Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
please come you make the beer taste better
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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