We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
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