its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
its liver damage thursday
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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