the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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