i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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