So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
