We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
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