thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
