Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Randomize
