Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
