She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Holy shit dude........stairs
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