i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
