I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
