i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
