I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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