You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Randomize
