I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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