i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I'm both gender and math confused
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
