Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Randomize