Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
