i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
