I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
