Just cropdusted the office
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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