Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
