Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
